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God didn’t take a break from loving you in your breakup — even if you’re the reason it’s over. There’s a unique shame and brokenness associated with breakups.
Relationships and love may be celebrated more in the church than anywhere else because we (rightly) love marriage so much.
Sorrow in the midst of the severing is not only appropriate, but good. God created you to enjoy and thrive in love that lasts, like Christ’s lasting love for his bride.
So feel free to feel, and know that the pain points to something beautiful about your God and his undying love for you. If you can come in and out of romance without pain or remorse, something sounds out of sync.
And the easiest way to find it is to rebound right away.
But if we care about God, our witness, our ex, and our future significant other, we’ll wait, pray, and date patiently and carefully.
This doesn’t mean you have to be ruined by every breakup, but there should be a sense that this isn’t right — it’s not how it’s supposed to be. God needs to show some of us the gravity of failed relationships because of what they wrongly suggest about him and his love for the church.
We’re looking, sometimes it feels frantically, for love, for affection and security and companionship and commitment and intimacy and help.
The hard-to-believe, but beautiful truth is that broken-up you a better you.
If in your sorrow you turn to the Lord and repent of whatever sin you brought to this relationship, you are as precious to your heavenly Father as you have ever been, and he is using every inch of your heartache, failure, or regret to make you more of what he created you to be and to give you more of what he created you to enjoy — himself.
In the right measure, it is the good and proper risk of all Christian fellowship.
As people come closer, and we need this in true Christian community, our sin inevitably becomes more dangerous.